Thursday, December 27, 2018

One Year

Yesterday was one year.

One year since diagnosis.

A year ago yesterday, I was at Methodist in Katy having a mammogram and ultrasound done, and then a biopsy of my breast and lymph nodes, because the doctor there thought it best to get it done immediately after seeing the results of the scans.

Jamie and the kids were at the cats' yearly vet appointment, and I was texting Jamie about what was going on, crying while apologizing for letting him know over a text.

The "official" call from my doctor came on the 28th, but I knew on the 26th.

As the 26th grew closer this year, I had more and more anxiety, which is unusual for me.  It took me some time to realize why, but when I did, it made sense - December 26th was the first anniversary of anything to do with all of the terrible cancer stuff I had been dealing with.  December 26th was when it all started.  The mass/lump/firmness in my breast had been felt earlier, but my doctor wasn't worried about it, so I hadn't really been, either.  December 26th was it.

We decided that we needed to have family time this year, since last year was filled with pain, loneliness, anxiety, and fear.  So this year, we started off by taking the cats to the vet all together, then we shopped for our first nice dining set (our Christmas present for each other), had a wonderful sushi lunch, and some quiet time at home together.

It was a very different December 26th from last year, and I spent the day reflecting on how incredibly blessed I am, and how grateful I am to be alive and here with my family.

God is good.  All the time.

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